The Wine Cult

So...as promised...an in-depth analysis of Two Buck Chuck.

Called "a brand of extreme value," Two Buck Chuck is a cute and catchy nickname for Charles Shaw wine, which used to be found for a whopping $1.99 at Trader Joe's grocery stores throughout California. It now averages $2.99 in California and $3.99-$4.99 in other states (damn the cost of trucking), but luckily the price change doesn't affect the rhyme. And unlike other forms of dirt-cheap alcohol (think Mickey's...Old E...wine in a box...) Charles Shaw is not only palatable, it can be quite good (and certainly leaves you with a milder headache the next morning).

Don't try to find "Charles Shaw Vineyards" or "Charles Shaw Tasting Rooms" in Napa or Sonoma, because the trick to the low price is the fact that Charles Shaw is actually made with a combination of other vineyards' surplus grapes and wines. Back in the old days (circa 1980) there was a Charles Shaw winery, but in a shocking twist of ironic fate the place went out of business and the name was purchased by the Franzia family (aka the barrons of box wine).

Since 2002, Mr. Franzia has been selling Charles Shaw exclusively to Trader Joe's. Apparently he's taken great pleasure in his ability to drastically undercut all other table wines while simultaneously "tricking" tasters at the California State Fair to vote Chuck the Best Chardonnay Ever. Or something. However, regardless of his abilities, the man is clearly good at his job - he's selling somewhere around 5 million cases of wine each year and the numbers keep rising. The guy has his eye his next target - Walmart. He's in negotiations for a ginormous contract with the Lifeblood of Middle America. Chances are, that'll make him more money.

Here's a paragraph from a piece on Mr. Franzia on CNN: "Hating pretentiousness isn't just a business plan. It's Franzia's entire identity. His office is a wood-paneled trailer with carpet holes repaired with duct tape that looks like it might house the night manager of a troubled dude ranch. He uses his cell phone only in his car, and he has no computer; his assistant prints out his e-mail messages in the morning, and he handwrites his responses on them."

What a guy. What a wine. What a marketing strategy. I dig.